Friday, May 13, 2011

Bittersweet Day

Yesterday was a bittersweet day for me.  We had purchased a conversion van, the BIG HUGE one, to transport Ashlie and her wheelchair in.  For some reason I had named her Betty.  Yes, I do realize that it is a bit odd to name a vehicle, but... I did.  She was quite old and had very high mileage... she was beginning to wear out.  I had to trade her in on a more economical car yesterday.  It was quite bittersweet.  I was excited to be getting a more dependable vehicle, but sad to yet again have to get rid of something that was Ashlie's.  I did remember to get a picture of Betty before I took her off to the dealership.
This was an extremely rough week.  Mother's Day took a lot out of me emotionally.  I still struggle with how other's can expect you to participate in someone else's Mother's Day activities involving young children, without thinking about the effects of it on someone who just buried a child.  Maybe I'm just being selfish...  really?  nah, I think others were being selfish.  I find that if I am at all assertive, people around me resent it.  Hmm... they are far too used to my letting them walk all over me.
TaTa4Now

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